7.30.2007
I'd Rather See Harry Again...Here's my contribution to "Funny Sentences in my Inbox":
From: J Mo
To: Me
Subject: Rather Odd
Your hero Dan Rather is down near the gates to the Capiol’s great walk
sweating like a 77-year-old pig doing some sort of stand-up. Couldn’t tell what
his report was about.
7.27.2007
Dreams Can Come True
I had just finished downing a cheeseburger at Mike's Pub. Wandered back on to 7th Street to wait for photog to pick me up. As I'm walking toward Congress Ave., I notice a Republican-looking man. He looked familiar.
Then he came closer. Then I started freaking out.
Me: You're HARRY WHITTINGTON!"
Him: Yes, that's right. Have we met before?
[I then introduce myself enthusiastically]
Him: Nice to meet you.
Me: I RECOGNIZE YOU!!!!
(What kind of response was that?)
As you know, Harry is the CELEBRITY OF ALL CELEBRITIES that I've wanted to get a picture with. I am going to say that the reason I didn't is because he was moving too fast, but the truth is I was too stunned to react.
7.23.2007
Snippet from Stiles!"Expectant mothers only?!? Fuck!"
Men of the Week!
Glenn Quagmire
My friend John M0ritz (sold me his house)
Harry Potter
And by the way...
I won the Smoochiversary card smackdown this year, but only on a technicality. I called a point of order which Stiles sustained.
7.20.2007
Um, Yeah
I just saw three dudes in the FedExKinko's parking lot with a cat, on a leash.
SMOOOCH!Ah, July 20th. On this day in 1969, man first walked on the moon.
On this day in 2004, Stiles and I finally smooched for the first time.
That means it's our THIRD Smoochiversary. Tomorrow we trade our arts and crafts handiwork in the annual smackdown known as the "Construction Paper Smoochiversary Card-Making Contest". I won the first year, Stiles took the competition last year, and now it's best two-out-of-three.
/Nervous.
7.19.2007
Wisha I Looked like Trisha
Would it be cool to get my hair cut like Asian Reporter Trisha Takanawa's? She's kind of my new idol. I could take some different photos of Asian Reporter Trisha Takanawa to my Whitey Stylist, so that she gets a better idea of the cut.
7.16.2007
Cartoon Asian TV Reporters Rock
I don't watch
Family Guy, so it wasn't until recently that I learned the "token Asian reporter" cliche is a part of a TV show!
Family Guy features "Asian reporter Trisha Takanawa". She's not Trisha, she's "Asian Reporter Trisha". I found her myspace page, and it is delicious.
Profile highlights: Covering the top stories, getting the news to the people living in the city of Quahog, asian food, being asian... I love FISH BALL Soup! MmmMmm good!
(Okay, I have to admit that Fish Ball Soup is actually quite good.)
7.12.2007
"So everytime you see me, that's the worst day of my life."Okay, actually, it wasn't THAT bad. But Nate the photog and I did have a day peppered with progressively frustrating incidents.
-Before a noon liveshot, the mast's up, the camera and cable are ready -- then somehow, we lock ourselves out of the truck while it's running.
-While climbing the stairs to an observation deck, Nate trips, falls backward, nearly taking both of us out. He says something is still seriously not right with his back.
-An hour before airtime, THIS is what happened to our tape.
7.10.2007
Is that a traffic post, or are you just happy to see me?
Notice anything about the new traffic posts in Keizer, Oregon? The city didn't have any problems getting them up, but the posts' priaprism (an erection lasting more than four hours) is causing a lot of complaints.
"I just don't know quite why they're so big," one woman-on-the-street said.
"My son thought about putting a sign up on one of them that said, 'Always use protection," another woman-on-the-street said.
Watch the story (But there aren't any double entendres. For shame.)
7.08.2007
Transformational Men of the Week
Optimash Prime (the Mr. Potato Head Transformer)
I. Lewis "Scooter" Libby
HGTV's
David BromstadSarcastic Snippet from Stiles"Well. That was fun."
-after a trip to IKEA, following a trip to Costco, Stiles' version of domestic hell
7.05.2007
Beating Up the MayorI can't get enough of the story about LA Mayor Antonio Villaraigosa having a two-year long affair with a Telemundo political reporter who covered him extensively. (I guess you could say he "covered" her, too.) Though, the two of them didn't start dating until after she broke up with the Speaker of the Assembly, first. (Un-be-lieveable.)
The
LA Times tick-tock piece on the affair is a fascinating read. So are the TV message boards blowing up with posts like these:
"[The Mayor] is vacuous and without merit. He jumps at the chance of any photo-op. He probably would show up for the opening of a garage door."
"Doesn't make him a bad mayor..."
"Dios Mio!"
7.03.2007
The FingerYeah, so somehow I got dragged into playing some street ball on Saturday. I hadn't played basketball in about ten years. My lankiness really helped and I actually scored a few field goals, but I also scored a friggin' finger injury. I think I jammed it while playing some serious D.
It's gonna be another ten years before you see me and my mad ballin' skills again.
7.01.2007
Men o' the WeekState Rep.
Rick N0riegaRemy, from
RatatouilleThe dude who let me ride around in his canoe in the floodwaters
Snippet o' Stiles"You think they just pull a fish out of water, cut a nice little filet, and make a sandwich out of it? It may not even be fish! It could be octopus. Or soybeans. I mean who knows? All they have to do is get something that tastes like artificial fish and stamp it into filet shapes."
-criticizing my love for Filet 'o Fish
