Airport Outrage
I know what you're thinking. I am about to go off on a belligerent rant about American Airlines again. And how they suck almost as bad as Sprint, and how that will launch me into a rant about Sprint.

This airport outrage is a little different (and hopefully won't take me on such a long tangent). Last weekend I go to pick up my friend Justin at the airport. That didn't take long, until we got stuck in the PARKING LOT QUAGMIRE. Every exit sign took you to another exit sign, which contradicted the other exit signs. For example:

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Snippet from Stiles: Responding to Readers
"Please tell me where you work so I can come up with a silly name for it." -Stiles, to a reader who wrote in, calling the Houston Chronicle "The Comical" instead

Joementum: I Picked Him First
If you've read this here blog for a few years, then you know my favorite bloviating U.S. Senator has long been Joe Biden. (My ultimate favorite U.S. Senator is Orrin Hatch, because I thought he was a good Justice committee chairman and he puts out his own extensive catalog of patriotic music CDs).

In honor of Biden's pick as Obama's running mate, I bring you me and Joe circa 2006, followed by a link to previous Biden-related posts.

Don't we made a handsome couple?

The Real Joementum
Jack Meets Joe (5.2.06)
Men of the Week (11.5.07)
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Bored at Work

Photog Woody's inspirational message... to himself.

Many of us in the Capitol Press Corps have spent the summer choked by a collective sense of ennui, partly because the group is shrinking by the day as newspapers gut their bureaus, and partly because ever since the Texas primacaucus, nothing huge has come around to hold our attention.

The legislature meets only every other year. It's debatable whether meeting more often would produce a better state. Either way, this is an off year.

In June, the Governor's Mansion burned down at the hands of an arsonist. All investigators have to go on is that a dude who wore a UT baseball cap might be responsible. He could be at home playing Nintendo Wii right now, or if he's smart - he's playing Mob Wars.

In July, the heat killed my grass and nearly killed me along with it. (Chip and I decided years ago that we'd rather be hot than cold, but rather freeze to death than burn to death. These are the conversations we had in the news vehicles.) Besides the heat, nothing really newsworthy happened besides the fact the Star-Telegram bureau went from three man down to one. Sigh.

Now we're nearing the end of August, and the biggest thing I have to look forward to is a text message with Obama's VP pick. I hear it's gonna happen within the next 24 hours.
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Best Week Ever?
I discovered Mad Men on demand.
Oh, and I performed my first "drug smuggling by sea" in the game of Mob Wars.
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I Scream, You Scream, We all Scream OUTRAGE
It's only Monday, but I think I might have the Outrage of the Week. J-Mo and I are at Jason's Deli today. We are in a hurry to leave, but we MUST make the obligatory stop by the free soft serve station.

That's where we find a woman standing in front of the ice cream dispenser, with a giant to-go vat. She's filling it with chocolate ice cream, then proceeding to stand there with a spoon, flattening out any "air gaps" in the soft serve so that it fills the jumbo cup to maximum density.

Meanwhile Mo and I are alternating between standing there and trying creative ways to move around her. But homegirl, oblivious to other people's ice cream needs, is still standing there working on her "squirt-out-then-flatten-into-cup" routine. OUTRAGE!

"That woman didn't need any more ice cream, either," Moritz said later.

This reminds me of other loiterers I can't stand. That would be "loiter at the beverage bar guy". You know, the people who stand there at the beverage bar, serving themselves their drinks in small squirts to reduce fizz. Or the guy who squirts some out, then takes a sip, then squirts some out, then takes a sip. Or the guy who can't get his ice-to-drink ratio right so he keeps pouring out his ice or adding new ice... Meanwhile you are just STANDING there, wanting desperately to get your damn iced tea... OUTRAGE. Seriously. I hate you, beverage bar guy.
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When Mob Wars Strikes
My life has changed dramatically since Stiles got me to start playing Mob Wars. It's an incredibly linear --yet challenging -- game on Facebook. In the game, you do "jobs" to earn money so you can stock up on weapons or property. And that stuff helps you earn money.

So my conversations have turned into things like this:

"I need to get seven more pump-action rifles so I can do a bank robbery."
"I think I'm going to save up so I can buy five apartments at once, get a better deal that way."
"I have to wait to get out of the hospital because some asshole attacked me five times in a row."
"I got robbed last night and lost fifteen grand!"

As if the weapons, property and jobs weren't enough to keep you busy, there are also these things called "favor points". You earn them by signing up for stupid surveys that open up your computer to assloads of spam. But with just 10 favor points the "Godfather" gives you $200K or a free mobster or full energy to perform your jobs.

Enter Stiles, who is more obsessed with Mob Wars than even me. He decides to sign up for Blockbuster's online movie rental (which he already has -- he canceled his membership and signed up again) JUST so he could get 140 favor points. Considering it takes just 10 favor points to get hundreds of thousands of dollars -- 140 favor points was worth re-signing up for Blockbuster.com.

Fifteen minutes later, his favor points didn't show up on Mob Wars. That's when he took more drastic action, writing the people at Blockbuster to demand his favor points. (Yes, they are fake points in a fake game in which you recieve fake money.)
I signed up for this offer on Facebook's Mob Wars application last night, and I still haven't received the points. The ad claims this offer would report within 15 minutes. It's been 15 hours. I've also tried several times to receive help through the application with no response.

I'm user Maeo on Mob Wars:

Please handle this.

It's critically important that I buy a casino before my co-worker. :)

A few hours later, he sends me this screen grab (click to enlarge):

I think he bought that casino.
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High-Flyin' Outrage of the Day
I get an email from American Airlines, since I am still an AAdvantage member for whatever reason. Here's what it tells me:

As a valued customer who has booked an American Airlines ticket through Kayak.com or Sidestep.com over the past year, we would like to inform you that American Airlines fares are no longer being displayed on these sites. You may still find our content through many other meta-search engines for purchase through our award-winning web site, AA.com.

OK, so I can't search for cheap American Airlines fares on Sidestep or Kayak anymore!??! Not only do they lose my bags, make subtly racist comments in front of me, leave me stranded in DFW's baggage terminal for a long, cold night and charge $15 for the FIRST checked bag (which they will lose), now I can't even use outside search engines to find a cheap fare!?!??!

OUTRAGE! I hate you American Airlines. Not as much as I hate Sprint PCSuck, but it's close.

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