Multiple Choice
Which of the following happened during my ten minute drive to work?
a.) Someone tries changing lanes into me, coming within inches of disaster
b.) A random cyclist rides down middle of busy four-lane road, holding up traffic
c.) Man on foot with black hood covering face crosses said busy four-lane road, no regard to traffic
d.) All of the above
Okay smarty pants, you were right, the answer is d. Wonder if the man with the hood just committed a crime. I tell ya, I almost committed a crime by plowing into him.
5.31.2005
5.27.2005
5.25.2005
Doggie Style
So, a Spartanburg County man was arrested for "buggery" after a neighbor caught him raping Princess, her pit bull puppy. No wonder pit bulls attack humans.
So, a Spartanburg County man was arrested for "buggery" after a neighbor caught him raping Princess, her pit bull puppy. No wonder pit bulls attack humans.
5.24.2005
Re: The Rat Infestation
Update. We caught a rodent yesterday. Scott came to work and found one in the trap near Chip's desk. Hooray? I guess?
Update. We caught a rodent yesterday. Scott came to work and found one in the trap near Chip's desk. Hooray? I guess?
5.20.2005
Sorta Like a Venn Diagram
In honor of our soiree into the Southwest, I will do a little FW/Spartanburg compare and contrast. You know, like in elementary school when you made those venn diagrams with two circles and they overlapped and you had to write really small in the part where they overlapped? (Okay maybe it was just my elementary school.)
Fort Worth: Sundance Square
Spartanburg: Morgan Square
Fort Worth: World class art museums - The Kimball, etc.
Spartanburg: The stains on my building *could* be considered art.
Fort Worth: Mouthwatering Mexican food
Spartanburg: Drippy cheese options on several menus
Fort Worth: Infrastructure
Spartanburg:
Fort Worth: Channel 4, 5, 8, 11, 33, plus Telemundo and Univision
Spartanburg: Channel 4 and some other stuff that's arguably considered news
Fort Worth: Regular iced tea
Spartanburg: Sweet tea (Point SPARTANBURG!)
In honor of our soiree into the Southwest, I will do a little FW/Spartanburg compare and contrast. You know, like in elementary school when you made those venn diagrams with two circles and they overlapped and you had to write really small in the part where they overlapped? (Okay maybe it was just my elementary school.)
Fort Worth: Sundance Square
Spartanburg: Morgan Square
Fort Worth: World class art museums - The Kimball, etc.
Spartanburg: The stains on my building *could* be considered art.
Fort Worth: Mouthwatering Mexican food
Spartanburg: Drippy cheese options on several menus
Fort Worth: Infrastructure
Spartanburg:
Fort Worth: Channel 4, 5, 8, 11, 33, plus Telemundo and Univision
Spartanburg: Channel 4 and some other stuff that's arguably considered news
Fort Worth: Regular iced tea
Spartanburg: Sweet tea (Point SPARTANBURG!)
5.19.2005
Splurge!
Who just spent $1.99 for Suave's Fresh Mountain Strawberry shampoo?
It's me! It's me!
Who just spent $1.99 for Suave's Fresh Mountain Strawberry shampoo?
It's me! It's me!
5.18.2005
Worth the Trip
Back from Fort Worth-Dallas. Chip shot a box of tapes, despite a torn ACL. (He made it through the weekend, but I wound up getting him a wheelchair at the airport.)
Some highlights:
Angry Dog! (It came back to bite me)
The weather
Buying a pink cowboy hat (though I accidentally left it in the hotel room)
Wooing a steer
My new Vikas T-shirt
Getting removed by security from The Dallas Morning News building
Chip, on a certain DMN employee: "I wanted to tell her she had a GREAT body, but what was I supposed to say, 'Please adjust your microphone, by the way, you have amazing thighs?"
Back from Fort Worth-Dallas. Chip shot a box of tapes, despite a torn ACL. (He made it through the weekend, but I wound up getting him a wheelchair at the airport.)
Some highlights:
Angry Dog! (It came back to bite me)
The weather
Buying a pink cowboy hat (though I accidentally left it in the hotel room)
Wooing a steer
My new Vikas T-shirt
Getting removed by security from The Dallas Morning News building
Chip, on a certain DMN employee: "I wanted to tell her she had a GREAT body, but what was I supposed to say, 'Please adjust your microphone, by the way, you have amazing thighs?"
5.12.2005
Happy Birthday to Rog
For those of you who assumed I was an only child, you assumed wrong. I have a little brother who's not so little anymore! Roger turns 21 today (even though he started drinking back when the 2 and the 1 were flipped).
Roger and his girlfriend Tracy, totally wasted.
For those of you who assumed I was an only child, you assumed wrong. I have a little brother who's not so little anymore! Roger turns 21 today (even though he started drinking back when the 2 and the 1 were flipped).
Roger and his girlfriend Tracy, totally wasted.
5.11.2005
My ire against IRE
I wasted my precious* time applying for a scholarship to its annual conference only to get an email two weeks out that they don't have the funds to provide scholarships.
They offered free registration and membership instead, and asked my company to pay for air/hotel.
Nope, my company does not pay for air/lodging at IRE, I replied. But if I personally scrounge up enough money to pay for air/lodging... is the waived registration/membership offer still valid?, I ask.
"Your company must pay the rest!", exclaimed IRE's J0hn Green.
So that means I'm ineligible for the free membership/registration fee, just because my company won't pay for air/lodging?, I ask.
"Yes, your company must pay!" exclaims asshole Green.
WHAT THE SHELL WAS THE POINT OF OFFERING A SCHOLARSHIP ONLY TO NOT OFFER A SCHOLARSHIP?
Someday I am going to unleash my ire and set IRE on fire. You can bet my orange stapler on it.
*debatable
I wasted my precious* time applying for a scholarship to its annual conference only to get an email two weeks out that they don't have the funds to provide scholarships.
They offered free registration and membership instead, and asked my company to pay for air/hotel.
Nope, my company does not pay for air/lodging at IRE, I replied. But if I personally scrounge up enough money to pay for air/lodging... is the waived registration/membership offer still valid?, I ask.
"Your company must pay the rest!", exclaimed IRE's J0hn Green.
So that means I'm ineligible for the free membership/registration fee, just because my company won't pay for air/lodging?, I ask.
"Yes, your company must pay!" exclaims asshole Green.
WHAT THE SHELL WAS THE POINT OF OFFERING A SCHOLARSHIP ONLY TO NOT OFFER A SCHOLARSHIP?
Someday I am going to unleash my ire and set IRE on fire. You can bet my orange stapler on it.
*debatable
5.10.2005
Politicking Pastor Says Seeya
When did journalists become the collective Antichrist? Sure, the way we mobbed those 70 year olds at East Waynesville Baptist is sure to make them hate all journalists for the rest of their lives. But their Democrat-hatin' pastor wouldn't defend himself so it made our jobs trickier.
The bruhaha ended with the pastor's resignation. He's still not talking, but his lawyer says he's not apologizing either.
When did journalists become the collective Antichrist? Sure, the way we mobbed those 70 year olds at East Waynesville Baptist is sure to make them hate all journalists for the rest of their lives. But their Democrat-hatin' pastor wouldn't defend himself so it made our jobs trickier.
The bruhaha ended with the pastor's resignation. He's still not talking, but his lawyer says he's not apologizing either.
5.05.2005
Tony Blair is so sexy. Even if he has bad teeth.
5.04.2005
Cowtown, Taaaake Me Away
It's sweeps again. Coincidentally about 40 Spartanburg peeps - the Mayor, City Council, Chamber folks - are headed to Fort Worth next week. They're learning how to best be the stepchild to Greenville in the way Fort Worth is to Dallas.
Chip and I are going too, thanks to our generous GM. We're shooting packages for the next ratings book - July.
Even though we don't share network affiliations, WFAA is letting us work out of there, so many thanks to Uncle Belo.
It's sweeps again. Coincidentally about 40 Spartanburg peeps - the Mayor, City Council, Chamber folks - are headed to Fort Worth next week. They're learning how to best be the stepchild to Greenville in the way Fort Worth is to Dallas.
Chip and I are going too, thanks to our generous GM. We're shooting packages for the next ratings book - July.
Even though we don't share network affiliations, WFAA is letting us work out of there, so many thanks to Uncle Belo.
5.03.2005
The Juice and The Cream
I got injected with steroids this morning! I'm pretty excited to see any performance enhancements. I also got prescription steroid cream. Equally excited.
This is all because of the remnants of "The Great Kia Crash of 2003". I got a piece of glass stuck in my leg and the ER doc didn't clean the wound properly so part of the Kia window sorta just came out of my skin a few months later.
It left an itchy bump, shaped and sized much like a watermelon seed. Thought it would go away, and it hasn't, so I found myself a dermatologist (who happens to be a Ch. 4 devotee) and she shot my leg up with some 'roids to reduce the inflammation.
If that doesn't work she says she'll just cut it off.
I am quitting the steroids if I develop anything strange, like boobs.
I got injected with steroids this morning! I'm pretty excited to see any performance enhancements. I also got prescription steroid cream. Equally excited.
This is all because of the remnants of "The Great Kia Crash of 2003". I got a piece of glass stuck in my leg and the ER doc didn't clean the wound properly so part of the Kia window sorta just came out of my skin a few months later.
It left an itchy bump, shaped and sized much like a watermelon seed. Thought it would go away, and it hasn't, so I found myself a dermatologist (who happens to be a Ch. 4 devotee) and she shot my leg up with some 'roids to reduce the inflammation.
If that doesn't work she says she'll just cut it off.
I am quitting the steroids if I develop anything strange, like boobs.
By the DMAs
1.New York
Protz
2.Los Angeles (but traveling)
Jayna
3.Chicago
Jason
5.Dallas-Fort Worth
Dan
Jimmie
Seymour
Wongton
6.San Francisco
Hasser
7.Boston
Channing
Jonathan
Josh
10.Houston
Lil' Lost Robot
Matty
12.Phoenix
Erica
14.Seattle-Tacoma
Thomas
34.Cincinnati
Jay
36.Greenville-Spartanburg
Brad
Cinlach
Grayson
Michelle
Sappy Chick
47.Jacksonville
Garvin
49.Austin
Political Junkie
73.Toledo
Maureen
79.Columbia, SC
Doug
Will's Ladies
137.Columbia-Jefferson City
Wohleber
141.Beaumont-Port Arthur
Mark Hancock
150.Anchorage
Matthew
Foreign Bureaus
Jason (Hong Kong)
1.New York
Protz
2.Los Angeles (but traveling)
Jayna
3.Chicago
Jason
5.Dallas-Fort Worth
Dan
Jimmie
Seymour
Wongton
6.San Francisco
Hasser
7.Boston
Channing
Jonathan
Josh
10.Houston
Lil' Lost Robot
Matty
12.Phoenix
Erica
14.Seattle-Tacoma
Thomas
34.Cincinnati
Jay
36.Greenville-Spartanburg
Brad
Cinlach
Grayson
Michelle
Sappy Chick
47.Jacksonville
Garvin
49.Austin
Political Junkie
73.Toledo
Maureen
79.Columbia, SC
Doug
Will's Ladies
137.Columbia-Jefferson City
Wohleber
141.Beaumont-Port Arthur
Mark Hancock
150.Anchorage
Matthew
Foreign Bureaus
Jason (Hong Kong)
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